Birth Parents

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Birth parents play a very important role in adoption. In addition to the connection birth parents have to their specific adoption triad, they often play a larger role in peer post-placement support for expectant parents considering adoption and birth parents who are coping with the emotions associated with placement.

This section was created to provide information on open adoption, post-reunion relationships, and support for birth parents involved in adoption relationships. Unlike the other areas of the site, it focuses on issues that birth parents may face after placement, such as building strong relationship foundations, navigating reunion, and communicating with the child you placed for adoption.

The birth parent experience is unique and often involves emotions and feelings that differ from those connected in other ways. Coping with loss and guilt can be overwhelming for birth parents who lack a support network to help them identify and address those feelings.

If placement is recent for you and you're just starting the process of trying to sort out your emotions, talking with other birth parents can be helpful. First, it's important to remember that it's o.k. to feel sadness. Feelings of sadness often accompany loss and while you likely made your decision based on facts related to your current situation, it doesn't lessen the feelings of loss that you might be feeling.

There are a number of support groups locally and online that provide support, guidance, and information for birth parents after placement. Finding a support group either online or in person that fits your needs is an important first step when starting your journey. Not all support groups are created equal, and what works for one group of parents may or may not work for another. A good fit is important because it will help you work through the early emotions you're feeling so that you can focus on other important aspects in your life.

If you're a birth parent searching for the adult child you placed for adoption, a great place to start, in addition to finding a helpful support group, is the Reunion Registry.

The message boards also offer a wide variety of information and support from birth parents who have a number of different experiences.

Whether you're a recent birth parent or a birth parent who is currently enjoying a relationship with the adult child you placed for adoption, having a support network in place can prove to be an invaluable research.

Visitor Comments (65)
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Olga Ostashkov - 4 years ago
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My little brother when yet unborn were adopted in US by nice family,we now live in Israel,when that was -we were living in Russia,Moscow.I have smaller sister,and this brother we didnt know his name.He is about his 18 or something,adopted by nice oldders family,we got a picture of them and him when he was born.My mother came to US to give him birth there.He had an older brother who were adopted from Ukrainian woman and were older than him by 2 years or so.My facebook is malka Rubinshtein(מלכה רובינשטיין)I'm the only one from our family that do wanna meet day.My mother is 49 now and busy and father sick and yangest sis busy with her life.And its been years,I waiting to him to be in interest to find us... #1
Sy'ir - 3 years ago
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Hello, My name is Sy'ir Smith, and Im currently trying to help a friend by the name of Cystal Monroe find her birth parents. Unfortunately I wouldnt even know where to start, neither do she. She has no idea who her birth parents are or where she is from. But her adopted family is from Virgina and live here in Dallas, Tx. Crystal looks like a southern Bell, was born Sept 22 1986, if anyone can help or is looking for a daughter in late 20's please reach me at xxxx or xxxx or Via FB Sy'ir SMith I would appreciate it. #2
kiandra - 4 years ago
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hello, im 9 months pregnant and i am in the process of giving my child up for adoption, recently ive had a 3D ultrasound and i broke down , for my own reasonings i do not wish to change my mind about giving my child up for adoption but i know is going to be hard once i go through labor and see my daughter, i have plenty of questions but my case worker is hard to get in contact with and i wanted to know who was out there i would chat with, particularly someone who has been in my shoes as a single mother looking to adopt out a child, its stressing me thinking about the coming of my daughter and knowing im giving her away, is there anyone out there that i could communicate with #3
PATRICIA - 4 years ago
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Monica Lagle - 4 years ago
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I want to register for the future for my kids that my parental rights were terminated on can come back to me when old enough. Two of the four have done came back to me and are very happy now. Also my parents had two other children of mine that never went in the system. We are just waiting on the reunion one day for the youngest two boys. Brian Shinkle and Jordan Shinkle. I hear Jordan was adopted by rumor and his last name may be Williams now. It hurts me so bad, I hate the mistakes I made by losing my kids. I do love them all and have suffered and grieved terrabilly for them to be reunited with me. My heart breaks everyday for them and my heart yearns for name is Monica Lagle if you know Brian Shinkle and Jordan Shinkle please help me be a part of there life. I was young when I had my kids and I wish I never would have lost my parental rights. #5
daniela - 3 years ago
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It is the say after my son went home with his adoptive parents. After giving birth, I am exhausted..and very sad and missing my first baby boy. I have two little girls though, who I love very much and who I hope understand my decision. I am reaching out too anyone who can help me get through this. I need a friend, someone who knows how open adoption feels I am heartbroken, trying to stay optimistic..someone please help..I need a friend. #6
Jennifer - 4 years ago
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Hello My Name is Jennifer I`m looking for my children there birthnames are angela m Phillips and her dob is 3\12\90 Terry h Eckert 9\9\91and Justin j Eckert 9\12\92 I have found there little brother and we are talking he wants to see his brothers and sister they were adopted in 1997-98 from lucas county childrens home in Toledo ohio if anyone knows of or has any info on how I could find them please send me a message through my fb thank you in advance for the help #7
Becky Woods - 3 years ago
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I am almost 33 weeks pregnant and placing my son up for adoption with a great family. Among the normal emotions that come along with being being pregnant I'm extra emotional. I would like to find a group of people that are or have walked the same road that I am. I live in Kansas City. If any one wants to meet up for coffee please let me know. #8
Michelle Quick - 3 years ago
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Hello, My maiden name is Michelle Siobhain Wefsenmoe Iam a birth mother looking to reunite with the adoptive family and more so my daughter Sophia Patton which, last picture I had was when she was three that would of been in 2008 I have lost contact with the adoptive family and am trying to reestablish some kind of communication I want her to know how much I think about her every day and cant wait to see her beautiful smile again Sophia " I love you"Xoxoxo your birth momma Michelle :) #9
Joseph - 3 years ago
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My name is Joseph Borsky and I am attempting to reach one or both of my birth parents. My birth parents names are Richard Lee Hediger and Loretta Coaleta Fountain-Hediger and I was born on May 30th, 1965 in Eugene, Oregon. Any help with my search would be greatly appreciated. I am a paralyzed veteran and have concerns about any hereditary health problems that I may have, especially given my being paralyzed from the waist down after suffering 2 gunshot wounds. Thank you! #10
Guest - 4 years ago
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Hello, I'm priscilla idahosa from Benin city, Nigeria. I'm looking for my birth parents, I was put up for adoption in the year 1996 and my supposed birthday is on the 20th of February. My foster parents are the late archbishop Benson idahosa and his wife Margaret idahosa. I really want to meet my biological parents, I don't know a thing about them or what they look like. I'm not sure of the orphanage but I would really appreciate if you can help me find them. . Thanks. #11
Tammy - 4 years ago
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Hoping someone can help me out. The adoption agency that I used in Chicago, IL 20 years ago, has apparently either shut down or changed names. Does anyone have any ideas about who I can contact in regards to my file?? I may be contacted at xxxx #12
Sherri Harris - 4 years ago
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I found my daughter Kelley Shantelle Pruitt but to my surprise it said birth mother unknown and it was known and birth father Matthew Pruitt is NOT her birth father and I have original birth certificate and adoption papers but what her family won't do is tell her who I am and she has a brother who never gave up finding her nor did westop loving her.They need to contact me because of genetic problems. That is if they are really interested in her health I have facebooked her mother, her and her brother (adopted).People condemn birth mom but don't realize we never forget sometimes even forgive ourselves.Her birth dad never gave up on her her real one #13
Stephanie "Bulger" Anitore - 3 years ago
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I am trying to locate my son! Born October 29th 1985 Monmouth county thru Catholic Charities! They claim kids are raised knowing they are adopted but I can't get any information #14
linda - 4 years ago
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i am looking for my daughter we were talking to each other then all of a sudden i have not heard from her i am so worried about her, her name is jenifer ellen neely she lives in oklahoma, if any one knows her. please tell her to check messages i have left her on this website. i pray i will hear from her she was born dec. 13th 1975 in east stroudsburg pa. #15
leslie - 3 years ago
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Hello my name is Leslie Ayala I'm looking for my nephew Michael aiden Ayala he was born April 2009 if anyone can help me plz contact me xxxxx #16
provplace - 4 years ago
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Thanks for the great information..... #17
Sheela Cavin - 3 years ago
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I am looking for my son. He was born March 6th 1972 at Providence Hospital in Seattle, WA. He weighted 9LBS 8 0z. There is emptiness in my heart now for 42 years. #18
maxine - 4 years ago
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hello i'm looking for my son was born on 09/21/1982 in Fairfield,Io. at 8:45 he has two scars on his left arm if any body knows him please let him know i'm looking for him his name at birth is Lloyd Allen Heimer,Woodson parents is Maxine sue heimer and father is Jackie Allen woodson i have not stopped searching for you and i wont stop at all #19
Josephine - 4 years ago
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looking for my dad was born 4-18-66 -in Philadelphia....he was adopted thru Catholic Charities of Phila. Adoptive parents last names were Chiarello #20

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